Is it always easy? No, there are always obstacles. After my last pregnancy I fell into I guess what they would call postpartum depression for about 4 months. I am generally a pretty upbeat person but I could say it was one of the hardest times of my life. I never really believed in postpartum depression but I’m a believer now. I could actually feel like something was physically wrong with my body, it is something I will not forget. The baby was easy. She slept through the night day one and onward. It was the horrible way I felt. I did not take any antidepressants as I don’t believe in them but in January when I made mention of what I went through with my obstetrician later, he shared that for most of his years in practice (over 35 years) he never believed in antidepressants either but now he’s okay prescribing something for women for about 3 months and then they are okay after that. Dr. Kilgore is a very honorable and religious man, and we are blessed to have him as our doctor. Anyways, I am trying to not let my worries or fears creep in and crowd out the blessings that are there with this new pregnancy. If I ever go through what I went through after Hannah was born, I will take the helps that are out there.
I am just sitting here and still can’t believe I am pregnant! I love being pregnant. It is one of the most wonderful times during my life. I have such a wonderful journey I get to go through again. I am so looking forward to it. I love wearing maternity clothes and looking like a mom. The Lord’s really changed my heart on my appearance. I always had to dress for the world, whether it was fashionable in my 20’s or business attire (Jones New York, etc…) in my early 30’s at the FAA. Now I simply dress simple and love it! It’s a lot more comfortable and it reflects who I am too. It is so nice to have been out of work for over 2 years now. I’ve really been able to find out who I am and see where I am going. It is really too bad that some people don’t want to be a part of this journey with me.
If it’s a boy – Matthew Jeremiah
Girl – possibly Leah
Here I’m almost 38 years old and having children yearly. Each of our children will be about 14 months apart (I think). How neat! I know it’s a bit hard at times now but I always picture one day being in the kitchen (I love to cook) and looking out and seeing all the children older and playing, doing farm chores outside. No kids playing under my feet, getting into drawers or needing to be picked up or hugged. It will be sad. I will miss this time. So, I just try to think upon those thoughts when I start to feel pressed or ungrateful.
We can’t forget the important date is set for: November 2, 2008. Yikes, that sounds so far away! But I’m not even close to being ready yet either.